OUR LOVED ONE REMAINS THE SAME

"In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit. "  Albert Schweitzer

"We are not victims of aging, sickness and death. These are part of scenery, not the seer, who is immune to any form of change. This seer is the spirit, the expression of eternal being."   
Deepak Chopra

I believe we are all spirits wrapped in skin, but I also believe that cancer, like an amoral thief, steals from our loved ones until visible signs become hard to ignore.  Cancer steals strength.  Ernie said the other day that he regretted that he was unable to do certain things he used to be able to do because he now lacks the strength.  However, he has no lack of mental strength or determination.  That he has demonstrated over and over during this long journey.  

Cancer has stolen energy and stamina.  Most afternoons he takes a nap (and I often join him) and the naps rejuvenate, so there is a solution to the energy dilemma.  Cancer has caused weight loss over time, but with a careful attention to diet, he is able to monitor and maintain weight: another solution.  

This journey is one of incredible highs and gut wrenching lows, but although cancer attempts to steal joy when times are low, Ernie resists through humor, teaching the rest of us how life's battles can be won.  Cancer can isolate its victims and caregivers as well, yet true friends have continued to include us in activities to keep our world from becoming too limited. 

I would be lying if I said this is easy.  Life has changed for him.  Life has changed for me.  Adjustments have had to be made and continue to be made to accommodate each change.  But if I remember that he is the same spirit wrapped in skin I have always loved and will always love, whatever lies ahead is possible to endure.  

Whether our loved one is mother, father, daughter, son, child, husband, wife or friend, Josh Grobin's song "You're Still You" says it better than I ever could.